19 January 2014

Father Rayappu Joseph confesses


[In a parallel universe of course...]


Lord, let me start with a disclaimer.  I am frail, M’Lord.  That’s because I am human, M’Lord.  I falter, M’Lord.  That too because I am human, M’Lord.  I err, M’Lord.  That’s human too, M’Lord.  M’Lord, I am blinded by ignorance and arrogance and this myopic condition is further aggravated by my prejudices; I am human.  
 
I was ordained a priest in 1967 at the age of 27.  I was appointed Bishop of Manner in 1992.  I’ve seen a lot in my life and in my ministry.  There was a lot that I saw and there’s a lot that I described.  And yet, Lord, there was much more that I was silent about.

Lord, you see all, you hear all.  You even hear our silences.  You notice our frailties and the error of our choices.  I know it is not mine to question and I ought to know that I am being tested.  But Lord, I forget.  I slip. 

In my anger, ignorance and arrogance I forgot that we are all your children, that is myself, my congregation, those who share my faith and ethnic identity as well as those who don’t.  They are your children too, those that people I call ‘friends’ call ‘enemy’.  I judge when that’s what you have to do.   
Forgive me Lord for my presumptions.

I have borne false witness, Lord.  I’ve lied about my neighbor. Indeed I’ve lied about my friends.  I’ve employed rhetoric and half-truths to cover up for their crimes.  I should call those who fish, fishermen; I should call those who are harmless, lambs; I should call those who hack children and pregnant mothers to death, butchers.  I have not, Lord, and that’s because I chose to focus on the crimes, perceived or real, perpetrated by ‘others’. I forgot Lord that in your Kingdom there are no ‘others’.  I forgot Lord that charity begins at home.  Forgive me, Lord. 

I know about abductions of children and conscription of same for military purposes. I did not name the abductors ‘child-snatchers’ and I did not point them out either. I did not object.  I know that some 300,000 civilians were corralled into restricted spaces and used as a human shield. I never once called them ‘hostages’.  Instead Lord I poured invective on those who eventually rescued these innocents at great cost too.  Those whom I deliberately misnamed ‘boys’ shot those who tried to flee and even sent little children with explosives tied to their person so they could explode at points where the fleeing were received.  I did not object.   I did not even admit to myself that these were acts that you Lord would abhor.  Forgive me, Lord. 


I knew all along Lord that the Government, INGOs, UN Agencies and diplomats of powerful nations worked tirelessly to get food, medicine and other essential supplies to the people held hostage.  I know that if there was any intention of killing civilians, the Government need not have bothered to do all this.  I know that the ‘boys’ pilfered these supplies and starved those in whose name they claimed to be fighting.  I didn’t utter a word of objection. Forgive me, Lord.   

I know that over 11,000 ‘boys’ were released by the security forces. I know that this is unprecedented. You know Lord that the United States of America and other countries raising concern about how the Sri Lankan security forces operated during the war would never even entertain the thought of releasing prisoners.  I have not had the grace to acknowledge all this; I’ve not had the humility to acknowledge error. Forgive me, Lord. 

I lied about the numbers, Lord.  You know.  I need not elaborate. 

I have not forgiven those who I claimed were trespassing even when they were not, but forgive my trespasses Lord.  Empower me Lord with that which I lack, make tender that which anger has made hard within me, hone me Lord more closer to your image, give me the humility of your Son, grant me the strength to submit to your Commandments, receive me again and again with your incomparable love.  Forgive me, again and again, so I could also learn to forgive, to forgive myself. 



8 comments:

  1. Oh ! Lord! Finally i wish to add a postscript to what was presented through the Editor of The Nation, and that is as given below.
    I have seen,read through and it was true from the beginning to the end.But, I will say to the world that I never saw such a thing or pretend that I do not know about such. But, you know everything and you pardoned me right through.I know that you are testing me and the rest of the world.Please continue doing so as you do not want the world to know, as a part of your testing.

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  2. There's a lot that you see and a lot that you describe; and a lot that you are silent about too, Malinda.
    Fr Joseph is not alone in his prejudices.

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  3. He is not alone. But he is particularly virulent and has a huge impact too. Makes a difference.

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  4. Maybe. But that doesnt excuse our own
    prejudices and silences. We tend to point fingers at others while we ignore our own faults. Silence has an impact too.

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  5. yours is a recipe for silence. i state my prejudices often enough. haven't heard many people do that and certainly not the reverend.

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  6. @sajic

    Did you say "Maybe." to Malinda's assertion "But he is particularly virulent and has a huge impact too."? You are not convinced? Are you saying Malinda should not criticize this priest?

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  7. This guy is not a priest - he is the devil in disguise. It is only the devil who will set people against each other. A good priest, on the other hand, will try to bring people together. Come on, use common sense to work out the who is behind the mask.

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  8. Ryappu Joseph has the license to commit a crime and later ask for forgiveness. This is the weakness in the Catholic religion, as people like Joseph take mean advantage of this silly belief that sins can be washed away through confession. This is like the South African Truth Commission, where the USA orchestrated the washing away of crimes committed over generations.

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