[In a parallel universe called
‘Humility’...]
I am taking a break. A
tea break. Without milk. I have 15
minutes. Enough to write down some thoughts.
Here goes.
There are things I can
say and things I can’t. I am a
pediatrician, yes, bu I will not say, for example, whether or not I am a member
of the Sri Lanka College of Paediatricians.
I can talk of things I’ve done and do, but I will not promise what I
will do tomorrow or even what I will not do.
That’s as honest as I can get. That’s the limit of my humility.
I am a neonatologist. I also work in
the private sector, charging exorbitant channeling fees. Some might even say I am a businessman, for I
am a major peddler of formula milk.
Indeed, I won’t be surprised if you, dear reader, see no difference
between me and a narcotic drug peddler.
For those who don’t know, a
neonatologist deals with children under one month of age, in other words
newborns. I am frequently ‘in
attendance’ when a delivery is made, especially if it is complicated.
More often than not mothers are
pretty stressed out before, during and immediately after delivery, especially
if it’s the first child. Such mothers
have never breastfed and often come up with the complaint, ‘No milk!’ On such
occasions, I have not, as I should have, encouraged the mother to breast milk
the infant. I subtly introduce a term
she has never heard before, ‘infant formula,’ and also throw in some brand
names for good measure. In this way I
casually subvert the ‘6 month exclusive breast feeding’ recommendation, cooking
up a new mix, ‘formula milk plus breast milk’.
In short, I cash in on the stress of
the young mother. At the end of six
months, mothers often ask me, ‘How do I wean the child?’ I don’t talk of rice
based food or mashed vegetables, fruit juices or fruit pulp. I immediately
prescribe stuff that comes out of a box. Yes, I never fail to name some brand
of formula milk.
You see, this is how I (and I know
some of my colleagues do it too) get around advertising restrictions with
regard to formula milk. I am no
nutritionist, but I know enough about nutrition, the nutritional needs of
infants and little children, the anxieties of mother and of course the needs of
those who peddle various kinds of milk based foods. And of the last, I am quite
aware of the fact that false claims, exaggeration and scare-mongering are part
and parcel of their marketing strategies.
They, like I, probably have heard the word ‘ethics’ but either don’t
know the meaning or don’t really give a damn, either way.
So you can understand, I am sure,
that I will never ask other pediatricians or gatherings of pediatricians about
sponsorships and other benefits. I will
never bother to assess the quality or safety of the products and brands whose
names I toss out to anxious young mothers as though telling them ‘observe the
five precepts’ or ‘say the Lord’s Prayer three times’.
I am a doctor, yes. I know medicine.
I am not a nutritionist, but I am aware that most patients treat doctors as
though doctors know everything. In fact I could tell them what brand of fridge
is best and I am pretty sure they’ll think ‘he is more informed than I am, so I
will go buy that one’. I abuse this
trust.
That’s what my life has been so far,
ladies and gentlemen. As I said, I will
not say what I will or will not do tomorrow. For now, it is enough that I
confess to what I have done and what I do now.
Spilt milk: I know there’s no use crying over it. What’s done is done. I may spill a lot more milk or I may not
spill one more drop. If I did some spilling, I may cry about it, but I am not
promising that I will.
This is a ‘just-so-you-know’ note
from me. Anonymously penned. For obvious reasons!
Ok, tea break over. There is some noise out there in the waiting
area at the channel center. Babies are
crying. Mothers are probably anxious.
Doctor though I am, I can’t really explain why I am salivating right
now.
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