From now on I will take my studies seriously, a student
might say. I will shed all my bad
habits, save money, focus harder on my work so I can develop my career, an
adult might say. I will take the five
precepts really seriously, the religiously inclined might say. I will abide by the 10 Commandments, really,
Christians and Jews might tell themselves.
We won’t find all politicians and crooks resolving to take ‘yahapaalanaya’
seriously or hand themselves in, respectively, of course, but that’s ok. In general, landmark-days are for
resolutions. That’s the problem with
landmark days. They are probably the
least important and least compelling reasons for ‘turning over a new leaf’.
The other day I was reading a draft of a novel by a young
man from Tangalle. I won’t give details
of the story. The main character, as a
young man, working as a waiter, finds a wallet that someone had dropped in the restaurant. There was no one around, so he took it. He took it home and opened it. He found a sum of money that astounded
him. He also found a visiting card,
which told him that it belonged to a foreigner he had served earlier in the
evening and who had tipped him handsomely.
And then he started thinking.
“Should I return it? Is
it a theft? No, I did not steal it, I
found it! But then again, I know who the
owner is, and I know it does not belong to me.”
Greed and morality grappled with one another within him for
a long time. And then he
remembered. He remembered the first time
envy and greed bested precept and fear of reprisal. He remembered the punishment, the
admonishment and the resolve not to err.
It had not happened on the first of January. It had not happened on the day of the Aluth
Avurudda. It had not happened on a
birthday. It all came together on a
random day. And it stuck. Deep.
The young man returned the wallet.
What happened next is for ‘later reading’ obviously, so I will keep that
page empty. What’s important is that
resolutions that tend to be kept intact for lengthy periods of time are
typically made not on landmark days but unforgettable moments. Turning points are random, in this
sense. This is perhaps why we can all
look back on resolutions made on the first of January and feel a bit
embarrassed.
This does not mean we should not resolve on the first of
January of course. It probably works for
some people. And if one or two of a
list of say a dozen resolutions stick, that’s something to be happy about. Still, it is good to be real about these
things. If we leave out the fun element
of ‘resolving’ then it’s good to know that it is silly to go overboard with
it.
Perhaps a good way to get a hang of the true dimensions of
the resolution game is to revisit your list one week later, one month later,
three months later and so on. A better
way is to take a step back and do some serious reflection when something hits
you hard (metaphorically of course). Sometimes
the hit is so hard that you are sent back a few steps anyway and that
helps. But life doesn’t hit you left and
right in that way at every turn. There
are some hits that are more significant than others. Those are the moments when meaningful
resolution can happen.
We all have wallets we should return to their owners. We all have reasons to say ‘sorry’ or ‘thank
you’. We all postpone such things. We let ourselves be overwhelmed by the
realities of the moment and add a word to the must-do things. Later. Must do, but later. And it never happens.
It is fun to make a list New Year Resolutions. Sure.
It is good to keep things real too.
And real can be as fun as make-believe.
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