Bandagiriya does not exist, okaaaay?

Bandagiriya?

There is no water issue in Bandagiriya.  Therefore there weren’t any protests about water scarcity.  And the police that did not come to control the crowds that did not come to protest did not beat them up either.  Heck, Bandagiriya doesn’t even exist!

Congrats MS & Co!

Over 270 days have passed since Maithripala Sirisena became President.  That’s 170 days beyond the ‘100 Days’ by the end of which we were led to believe Sri Lanka would be a different country.   All promises have been kept.  Three hearty cheers for Maithri, Ranil, Champika, Chandrika, Rajitha and Rev Athureliye Rathana. Hoooooooray!  Pfffffffffffft!!!

It’s not about problems and protests

Rathupaswala is Rathupaswala in the way Bandagiriya cannot be Rathupaswala.  Because no one has been shot dead?  Nah…..it’s about who is putting down protests. 

 Bandagiriya protesters are inhuman

If they are beaten up, if they are arrested and detained illegally, if they are killed, it won’t be a violation of human rights.  Those protesting the acts of omission and commission of Human Rights Champions are inhuman.  Period.

Che Pau

The good thing is that the JVP still remembers Ernesto Che Guevara.  The down side is that the party is still piggybacking on the revolutionary romance associated with that image.  But then again, having unceremoniously dumped Marx, Lenin and even Comrade Wijeweera, retaining some ‘Left’ iconography is understandable.

Hospitals in Afghanistan

 Hospitals in Afghanistan (and Syria and whatever country the USA chooses to bomb) are Health-Shields used by terrorists.  At least that’s what Washington-speak is telling.

Patient Terrorists

Patient terrorists are not the same as terrorist patients.  Don’t be surprised if John Kerry tells us that 'those in the bombed hospital in Afghanistan were terrorists disguised as patients.'

The Hospital Business

That hospital in Afghanistan had NO BUSINESS to be where it was. It deliberately stood in the way of bombs. In the very least it should have moved to safety (like into a bunker) when the threat was first perceived. Right?

Harsha’s Volkswagon

Dr Harsha de Silva was spotted driving around Colombo in a clapped out Volkswagon.  He looked a bit down in the mouth.  Harsha in a Volks, folks?  Are you sure? 

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The Sirisena Dictionary and other politidbits of the week

The Sirisena Dictionary

Having submitted to the dictates of the United States, Maithripala Sirisena screams, ‘Victory!’ and adds that he ‘saved the war heroes’.  Did someone mutter, ‘victory my foot!’?  Now if a resounding defeat warrants celebration that costs taxpayers tens of millions of rupees, what would the President have done had he been in charge of defeating terrorism, one wonders.

Following the leader

If it is good for the Big Boss of Yahapalanaya then it is good for his followers.  That’s the beauty of taking care of the near and dear.  The Presidential brats are getting special treatment.  His brother got a plum appointment. So what’s wrong with Ravi K giving a helping hand to his various b-i-l’s eh?

Yureni’s show and tell

Young TV presenter Yureni Noshika didn’t do any wrong. Some people thought she did.  She ‘showed’ they claimed. Hardly!  If what was ‘shown’ was inappropriate it would put an end to village women wearing the diyaredda. Anyway, Yureni apologized to those who may have had their tender sensibilities bruised.  When will Daham, Chathurika and Papa Sirisena apologize for clear abuse of privileges? 

Uncle Sam’s chagrin

Washington is upset.  Correction: Washington is always upset.  It creates one monster to deal with previously created monsters that have got out of hand.  Mujahidin, Taliban, al Qaeda and ISIS were all nursed by Uncle Sam at one time or another.  When things go out of control, Washington decides to drop bombs.  Embassies, schools, hospitals are all fair game.  The self-appointed Global Policeman is a blundering idiot.  A ‘ditherer’ someone added.  And when someone who knows what’s what comes around and shows how it is done, Washington pouts.  Childish, right?

 The New Price-Formula

Does anyone know what happened to reducing prices?  It was a BIG election promise, remember?  Anyway, Rajitha Senaratne seems to have come up with a novel idea to justify price increases – just say that the particular item is harmful to health.  He lied about Coconut Oil, but was correct on salt and sugar.  But don’t be surprised if he says ‘petrol is a harmful substance and therefore to discourage consumption we will increase its price’.

 The Silence of the Lambs

We are referring to those dainty creatures in NGOs, fly-by-night outfits such as ‘Puravesi Balaya’ and of course self-righteous journalists, academics and other professionals who heard the term ‘yahapaalanaya’ just the other day.  These lambs are maintaining complete silence over Sirisena-style nepotism.  Why?

Is the lynching mob going to hang themselves?

They wanted ‘Kondaya’ hanged.  Well, suppose he was hanged.  There’s a problem though.  His brother has now confessed to the rape and murder of the little girl.  This means that Kondaya would have been murdered.  So will the murderers hang themselves or will they ask to be lynched?

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The Man in Blue and other Politidbits of the Week

Disclaimer:  It’s not that there’s nothing to say about other things, but President Maithripala Sirisena’s UN visit has provided such mind-blowing bloopers that in the interest of sanity we have to laugh.  Actually the poor President is not to blame.  It’s his son. Well, the President made the initial mistake of dragging his son to New York, but he can’t be blamed for what the brad did thereafter. 

Dr Nirmal Ranjith Dewasiri has an interesting take: ‘Namal Rajapaksa has a defence of sorts regarding the abuse of state resources and his father’s executive power, but Daham certainly does not.  The people voted for Mahinda Rajapaksa and his political identity in particular.  So it can be argued that Namal has the out of his father’s legacy.  However, those who voted for Maithripala Sirisena on January 8 (except perhaps some people in Polonnaruwa), did so not to ‘Maithripala Sirisena’ but the common candidate of the Opposition.  Therefore he, Sirisena, cannot use the relevant powers as a personal right.  Therefore Daham does not even have the straw that Namal can cling on to.’

Convoluted and incomplete of course, but that’s Nirmal.  It’s not about why people voted and what they voted for.  It’s about what’s right and wrong. Sirisena promised to right wrongs. He said ‘no more nepotism’.  He promised that none of his near and dear would benefit from him being President.  Well, his children apparently have not been paying attention to his campaign speeches or reading his pamphlets.  And he himself seems to have forgotten!

The man in the blue suit 

It had to be a suave, well-educated, highly sophisticated expert on foreign relations, international law, human rights issues, good governance and all that jazz.  Had to be.  Could not be a brat called Daham Sirisena.  

Next stop Buckingham Palace

The man in the blue suit was photographed shaking hands with Indian Prime Minister Narendra Singh Modi.  First Modi the Good, Friendly Neighbor.  Then?  Well, Barack of course.  Putin? Nah!  But Buckingham Palace beckons.  Rumor has it that Elizabeth has a special pair of gloves (never yet worn) which she can take off when she gets the rare opportunity to shake the hand of the Man in Blue.  

Identified!

The man in the blue suit was identified eventually.  Daham Sirisena.  The President’s son.  People asked what Daham’s status in the Sri Lankan delegation was.  ‘Nepotism!’ some cried.  They all seemed to have forgotten that just a couple of weeks ago his sister and the President’s daughter, Chathurika, had checked out the problems of some folk in a remote village and that she had done so with an entourage of state officials. No ‘status’ there either.  Brother Dudley was put in charge of Telecom.  So why should Daham be less privileged, is the question that was not asked.

Change can be photoshopped

The cries of horror had an impact. Someone was embarrassed.  The managers of the President’s official Facebook decided to do some damage-control.  They edited out both President and Presidential Brat from a picture of the Sri Lankan delegation and this when the original was already doing the rounds.  That dumb, yes! 

The Right of Transferability

Daham is a brilliant young man.  He’s already taught us a lot of things.  Like transferability.  He says that people are making an issue out of nothing.  Apparently his mother had got an invitation and since she couldn’t go he was going in her place.  ‘Daham to stand in as Maithripala Sirisena’s spouse!’ is a headline that all mainstream media and social media missed.  But there’s something really strange which again no one bothered to ask Daham to explain:  what happened to the spouses of the rest of the Heads of State?  ‘They were all photoshopped!’ did someone quip?

The deafening silence of the lambs

Here’s the funniest part.  All those shrill objectors to Rajapaksa-style nepotism are maintaining strict silence.

Why is Ranil smiling?

Ranil has not said a word about the Man in Blue.  He knows which side of the slice of bread is buttered, perhaps.  He is smiling though.  All the time.  

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'From bad to bad' and other politidbits

Nomenclature 

Some were silent during MR's time. It was called censorship.  Some said ‘fear-culture’. Those who were silent then aren’t loud now.  Jehan Perera says this is because of ‘transition’.  From what to what?  Bad to bad?

Maithri is ‘hanging on’

He bragged he would do this and that.  Finally, he has had to hang on to the hangman’s rope!

Maithri’s moods

The man jokes (doesn’t mean he’s a joker).  Pruning presidential powers, electoral reforms, the Right to Information Act, Good Governance etc etc….all jokes.  But he can be serious.  He is is dead serious online one issue: the conviction with which he says his boring mantra, ‘it could have been worse had I lost’.

Meaningless words/terms

There are words and terms that have lost meaning thanks to them being prostituted by the political.  In days gone by we had a word called ‘peace’.  Now we have ‘good governance’.

Words on their way out

There are words and terms which are in danger of becoming ‘dirtied’ due to politics: maithriya, reconciliation, co-existence, constitution, statesman, national government, constitutional reform etc.  The latest is ‘hybrid’.

Verale-Suda

With presidential powers and powers of the party leader, Maithripala Sirisena instead of cleaning up his party actually polluted it.  Cleaning up the beach is probably a clean-up job that he can have some success with.  Is this why people are calling him ‘Verale Suda’? 

Objectives

Some people form political parties, become leaders of these parties just so that they can one day lead the country.  Maithripala, on the other hand, operates as though he became the leader of the country so he can have a party that he could lead.

Going hybrid

Hybrid courts in a country that has a hybrid government.  Makes sense, come to think of it.

Seya’s murderer’s other job

Seya’s murderer also managed to bury the Coca Cola brouhaha.  What a guy!

Anura Kumara’s headache

Anura can’t figure out how to fill the National List when the next election comes around.  

Patali's headache

Patali Champika Ranawaka can’t figure out if he’s Maithri’s man or if he’s Ranil’s boy. 

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The adoh-machan theory of politics

The Adoh-Machan Theory of Politics

There was a time when Ranjan Ramanayake said ‘ADOH!’ to Nimal Lansa.  Now he says ‘Machang’ (softly, cooingly).  

The Thickness of Ego

Compassion, loving kindness, equanimity and the ability to rejoice at another’s joy are all thicker than hatred, envy and ego.  In politics, however, this is reversed.  Hatred, envy and ego are thick and are as thick as thieves.

The Nation’s Value

There’s a faint recollection that there was a time when Maithripala loyalists were muttering that a nation ought to have a limitless value (රටකට ඕනෑ අපමණ අගයක්).  They have a couple of questions to answer.  First, what’s Nimal Lansa’s value?  Secondly, does the nation need Nimal Lansa?

The Value of a Country

Lansa, Vijithamuni, Thilanga, Hisbulla and others know the ‘unlimited value’ of our country (රටකට අවශ්ය අපමණ අගය).

Value-Addition

Seek not from those who stake so much on hatred and vengeance an ‘unlimited value for our country’.  

Exchange Value

Today it’s Lansa and Arundika.  Tomorrow, perhaps, SB and Susil.  The day after?  Well, we could have Ranil and Maithri.  And while we are in this business of exchanging, wouldn’t it be nice if party loyalists can switch parties en masse?  

Post-Election Sri Lanka

A new country, certainly.  A new country plagued by an old disease.  

Democracy Re-defined

Democracy: A process which displaces twelve million people of a single country (or half its population).  For example, Syria. 

A Strange Creature

He is the General Secretary of a ‘green’ coalition led by Ranil Wickremesinghe. He is also the nominee to the Constitutional Council of the leader of the ‘blue’ party, Maithripala Sirisena.  Champika is therefore Ranil’s right-hand man as well as Maithri’s right-hand man.  A strange beast indeed. 

Bye-Bye Reconciliation

A person consumed by hatred who is a convicted fraud has been put in charge of ‘reconciliation’ — that’s how serious this government is about that ‘little matter’.

Ranil’s Lichchavis

The cabinet ministers, deputy ministers and state ministers are the Lichchavis of the 21st Century.  That’s according to Ranil Wickrememsinghe.  

Harsha and Geography

Dr Harsha de Silva promises ‘an economy-centered foreign policy’.  One would have though his first visit would be to China.  He’s gone to Hong Kong.  Part of China, true, but still! 

Thieves and Murderers

According to CBK, Maithri is the only clean SLFPer; all others are either crooks or murderers or both.  Therefore all the SLFPers who were given ministerial posts by Maithri are crooks or murderers or both.  Some generosity!

Tragedy

Replacing a Real Mahinda Regime with a Fake Mahinda Regime.  Note: ‘Fake Mahinda’ = Maithri-Ranil-CBK Triumvirate. 

Ranil’s Memory Loss

Has Ranil forgotten the recommendations made by friends he appointed to investigate alleged wrongdoing by friends he appointed to high places?

Hang Them Both!

Let us unreservedly condemn the release on bail of two bus drivers who planned and executed to perfection the crime of smashing into a PSD Defender from opposite times.  They should both have been hanged in court itself. Right?

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Extremists OUT! [and other 'politidbits' of the week]

Extremists Out

Those who read the performance of the Bodu Jana Peramuna as a defeat of extremism, say nothing about the multi-ethnic-multi-religious extremists and their performances [For the uninitiated, neither Buddhism nor pluralism are extremist doctrines, but among advocates there are extremists; in the case of the latter, those who talk of multi-this and multi-that but refuse to give percentages, for example.]  Here’s the breakdown of votes obtained:

Bodu Jana Peramuna                               20,377     (0.174399233284%) 

Frontline Socialist Party                            7,349     (0.062897382608%)

United Socialist Party                                1,895     (0.016218606619%)

Nava Sama Samaja Pakshaya                       644     (0.005511758661%)

Socialist Equality Party                                321      (0.002747320699%)

Liberal Party                                                 118      (0.001009918512%)

Vanguard Party                                               49      (0.000419372942%)

The subtext of Maithri’s smile

UNPers thought Ranil had won on January 8th.  They think that it was Ranil who won on August 17th as well.  

Anura Priyadarshana Yapa’s conundrum

He couldn’t manage the disaster that hit him.  How can he manage national disasters. Let us pray that there won’t be droughts, landslides, floods, tsunamis or cyclones during his tenure.

Cut-outs

Maithri’s cut-outs are out (as in, they’ve been taken down), but Ranil’s ones are ‘not-out’. Howzaaaaat? 

Anura Kumara’s Brag

‘We have the best National List!’ Anura bragged. That was then. Now, when the matter is brought up he asks, ‘National list? What’s that Sunil (Handunnetti)?  We haven’t heard of it, have we Bimal (Ratnayake)?’

Service Providers

There's a Minister of Dialog. None for Mobitel, Etisalat, Airtel and Hutch

The Missing Portfolio

And who is the Minister of Monologue?

Step-Motherly Treatment?

There's a minister for economic affairs and one for rural economic affairs...no one for urban economic affairs?

Ministerial Affairs

There's a minister for home affairs and one for internal affairs.  Are there external home affairs and 'foreign' internal affairs, then?

The Voting Error

Although Maithri asked them not to vote for the bad guys, he didn’t say he won’t give the bad guys cabinet portfolios.

Maithri’s Memory Loss

He’s forgotten he said ‘I will put an end to nepotism’.

Mahinda’s Memory Loss

He’s forgotten how powerful the office of the President is, even after the 19th Amendment.

Ranil’s Memory

He knows the presidential powers of his uncle’s constitution.  This is why he is chummy with Maithri.

A Missing Page 

There’s a missing page in the history book:  The Granary of the East is located in Mattala.

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The SLFP blues and other politidbits of the week

SLFP blues

Does the Sri Lanka Freedom Party need and OPPOSITION leader or a LEADER?

Sri Lanka as seen from Kekirilanthaya

When one gazes from Kekirilanthaya upon present day Sri Lanka or else Sri Lanka’s ‘present’, one sees a people who don’t seem to care whether or not there’s a Parliament and a Parliament that doesn’t seem to care whether people exist or not.

JVP’s capitulation

The machinations with the National List MPs has demonstrated that the JVP is following Maithripala Sirisena’s footsteps.  Maithripala, let us remember, only followed Mahinda, who followed Chandrika, who followed Premadasa.  Let us not forget the Ranil Wickremesinghe, from the Opposition, was no different.  He’s become better though.

Delight

It is delightful to know, finally, that Sri Lanka has a Parliament.  

Bad taste on the tongue

There are diehard Mahinda loyalists who never took issue with Coca Cola until now.  There are diehard Mahinda-haters in the Maithri-Ranil camp who don’t seem to have heard of Coca Cola.  When either group talks of ‘the nation’ and ‘the people’, it is palpably distasteful.

See also: The Biswal Visit and other politidbits of the week

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The Biswal take-over and other politidbits of the week

Maithri's 'Miracle'

More than a week has passed since results were released. Parliament has not been convened.  There’s no Speaker.  No Leader of the Opposition.  No Cabinet.  Just three ministers have been appointed, all to satisfy the various ‘areas of concern’ of a visiting US civil servant.  Now that is the kind of ‘Miracle’ that Mahinda never could deliver.

Maithri-Circus

‘Maithri-Circus’ or the business of using mandate as toilet paper began the moment election results were released.  The people can sit back and watch.  Don’t be surprised if it is marketed as ‘Mandate’ or even a ‘Revolution’.  Here’s a prediction: all those who were blurting out terms such as good governance, democracy, civility, respecting the people’s verdict, sovereignty etc., will go silent.

Rajapaksization

It took Mahinda several decades to become a Rakapakshist.  Maithri took less than 8 months.

A New People

After appointing the Prime Minister, the Leader of the Opposition, the Speaker and the janitors to clean up Parliamentary toilets, will Maithripala appoint a new people? 

Bless Dissolution

In hindsight it is a blessing that the 20th Amendment never saw the light of day.  Had it been passed the people would not have had the opportunity to witness the National List Kolama.  

JVP's Journey

The JVP’s ‘democratic’ journey since 1994 has been interesting: 1 seat in 1994, 10 in 2000, 17 in 2001, 41 in 2004 (courtesy SLFP votes), 3 in 2010 (courtesy Fonseka) and 6 in 2015.  That’s less 11 from the 17 returned the last time the JVP went solo.  A waste of 14 years due to flirting with the SLFP and UNP?

Sacking-Appointing Disease

Maithri is down with a terrible disease called Sacking-Appointing.  Don’t be surprised if he sacks the Elections Commissioner next.  If it gets worse, the good President might even sack himself!

Self-Appointments

This election was marked by a steady stream of posts in social media of official and unofficial results.  Thousands of cyber heroes turned themselves into temporary Elections Commissioners.  This democratization of the Department or rather its ‘peopleization’ to borrow a term from the Premadasa days, might in due course bleed into people appointing themselves as Commissioners of Examinations and positing official and unofficial O/L and A/L results.

Good Governance and the Good Governor

Political ‘experts’ in the media, universities, NGOs, members of the clergy and political parties/organizations who were on averaging uttering the term ‘good governance’ 279 times a day on average over the past 10 months have all declined to comment on the fascinating subject ‘The good governance of the good governor’.

Owners of the Majority

The issue that worried many was who would get the majority.  A related question is, ‘Who belongs to the majority’.  Well, the true majority are the voters.  Those who end up winners after post-election political games end up owning the majority.  It is always a minority that rules.  A section of the majority, lost in self-delusion, actually welcome this condition while others self-deluded for different reasons, lament. 

Lessons Learnt and to be Taught

The people of this country taught Mahinda Rajapaksa a lesson on January 8, 2015.  There’s a lesson that the Maithri-Ranil-Chandrika-Champika combine need to learn.  These anti-democratic, hatred-consumed individuals who do not know anything from the ‘g’ to the ‘e’ of ‘Good Governance’ will have to learn from the same teachers.  Sooner or later.

Mahinda, Fonseka and Parallel Lives

Friends once, foes later, Mahinda and Fonseka have suffered strikingly similar political fates.  Fonseka lost the Presidential Election in 2010, Mahinda lost in 2015.  In the General Election of 2010, Fonseka’s impoverished supporters used him to get into Parliament.  In the 2015 General Election, Mahinda’s all-but-out supporters used him.  Fonseka's backers duly abandoned him.  Abandonment is a real prospect for Mahinda as well.  Poetic justice, did someone say?

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