23 December 2014

Kolombians we will acquire class conciseness one day!

I’ve been talking to my fellow Kolombians.  It’s almost as if they have been silent for almost five years.  Some of them, not all, talk as though they’ve taken out words they had put in some back bedroom of their plush mansion, shaken off the dust and are now re-using them.  The same words I heard when Sarath Fonseka put up what appeared to be a much more than a ‘good run’.   He ran so fast through our minds that some of us thought that he could best Usain Bolt, forget Percy Rajapaksa (yes, I’ve not given up hope that he’ll accept Kolombian membership, honorary at least). 

They are at it again.  Back then it was SF, SF, SF even though not too long before there were some Kolombians doing their darnedest to get Percy and SF to let up and give Prabhakaran a breather.  Talk about not understanding our own interests!  Anyway, now it’s all Maithree, Maithree, Maithree.  And these are folk who wouldn’t know the meaning of either ‘Maithree’ or ‘Paalanaya’ if you were to ask them. 

This Maithree business is splitting our community in two, that’s what’s bothering me most.  There are those who see only ‘elephant,’ the color green and the letters U, N and P.  It was hard enough for them to think of the swan.  To their credit they managed to make the mind-shift.  I am betting that they can do the same this time too. 

That’s one lot.  Then there’s the other kind, those who don’t mix that which ought not to be mixed, identity and business interests.  We are essentially a selfish species.  We can complain about all kinds of things even if we are benefitting from whatever that is wrong.  Like business, for example. 

We don’t have proper regulations.    There is no even playing field.  Now why should a Kolombian even worry about such anomalies when anomaly is what puts food on our plates, allow us to build mini gymnasiums at home, party until we drop and of course strut around hollering to one another in English even as we look down our nose at the next guy who is resident on the other side of Anomaly-Town?  Beats me! 

This is not only a flawed system but the flaws are structured to benefit us.   Sure, now there are walkways in godforsaken places like Biyagama and Boralesgamuwa, but you get what I mean, right?  When it comes to business, it is all about theft.  The other day I was listening to a couple of upstart ‘walkers’ around Diyatha Uyana who were talking about something called the Labor Theory of Value which some fellow called Marks and his friend Angles had come up with.  It made sense to me.  Extracting surplus value, I heard them say.  But this theft that we see today is something much better.  It’s not something that is put in small print to escape the eyes of the gullible.  It’s in-your-face simple.  All about greasing palms. 

So what?  Whatever makes the wheels turn, right?  ‘Hand over fist’ is already too old a turn of phrase.  ‘Minting money’ is boring.  I can’t come up with anything that can truly describe the process and the proceeds.  Us Kolombians have never had it this good. 

But now, some of our less knowledgeable Kolombians want to give it all up.  For what?  Regulation?  Streamlining?   Haven’t these people heard about the goose that lays the golden eggs?  Amazing!

We don’t say it all the time, but I think we should say it now.  Hanky-panky is our thing.  Underhand is also our thing.  We don’t like terrorism and political stability but we love loopholes and flawed systems.  It’s time we acquired some class conciseness.  Yes, that’s another term I picked up listening to those two Yakkos at Diyatha Uyana. 

 *Everyone takes note.  Some keep notes.  Some in diaries and journals.  Some in their minds and hears.  Some of these are shared via email or on Facebook or blog; some are not.  Among these people are Kolombians, people from Colombo who know much -- so much that they are wont to think that others don't know and can't think. This is the eleventh in a series published in 'The Nation' under the title 'Notes of an Unrepentant Kolombian'.